The main thing that strikes me about all the chatter about “having it all” and “opting-out” or even “leaning in” is that it is not only extremely gender specific, but it also willfully ignores the fact that while a certain segment of society deals with a tyranny of choices (do I work? do I stay home? do I get a nanny? do I use daycare?), the majority of people in this country would view those choices as a luxury. There’s no two ways about it; it’s a privilege to feel stunted because all you do is sit around and bake cookies and organize carpools to and from your kid’s swim meets. That doesn’t mean there isn’t a worthwhile discussion to be had about whether or not women in high-powered careers should feel obligated to stay put for the good of their future or even for the greater good of a society that desperately needs more women in positions of power. Of course, there’s room for that conversation, but, well, that conversation has been ongoing now for at least a decade. Where is the conversation about the women who can’t afford the choice of opting out, who work minimum wage—or not much better—jobs and don’t have—never had—a partner to help them out? Those stories are easily as representative of American society as ones about women who went to Brown and Harvard and fell back into a successful career the moment they so much as thought about it.